Ponymon: 20 Red and Blue A Parody
by DeathGodsLikeApples
Summary: Pokemon, now 20% cooler.
1. Who the hey is that Pokemon?

Oh hai. If you're reading this then you've most definitely, probably clicked on the link entitled _Ponymon 20% Red and Blue: Crossovers are Magic_, a comedy fan fiction pairing Lauren Faust's wonderful little-girls-show-turned-internet-meme _My Little Pony _with Nintendo's popular long longing kleptomania-inducing _Pokemon_ games. You may refer to me as my MLP OC name: Egg Batter, and I'll be your host this evening as we ponder the idea of a crossover of these two different, but equally fantastic series in a fanficition (thanks for stealing my idea 10,000 times over, internet). As a big fan of both of these series I can honestly say that both sides will be treated with equal humor and respect to their references - THEY'RE BOTH GOING DOWN!

A-hem. I hope you have as much fun reading this as I am writing it…that is, if you want to of coure… *plays sad violin music* …I always was the odd one out *sniff* please don't…let me be forever alone! *fakes sobbing. Waits for tears from readers. Gives up.*

And yes, I'll accompany every sad moment in this fanfic by playing the violin… because I know how to play it. *poker face*

Lastly, if you're expecting any form of profane smut and garbage in this fanfic then you'll be solely disappointed. This fanfic does NOT contain any jokes concerning the following: sex, rape, offensive/strong language, pedophilia, impregnation, sexual fetishes, gay lesbians, hentai, gay lesbian hentai Octillary, gay lesbian Gym leaders with Octillary fetishes, gay lesbian Gym leaders who are Octillary wearing thongs and sunbreos, and any mention of Rule 34. (Other than the fact that I just created a new form of porn containing Octillary…beat ya to it internet!) So no naughty stuffs. Srsly. (Though I may add an innuendo once and awhile *wiggles eyebrows*)

Are you still here? *ENUCIATE MIND CONTROL SEQUENCE* Great! He he he he he ha ha ha ha ha ha HAHAHHAHAHAHA HOHOHOHOHEHEHOHEHOHOHO!

…A-hem. Our story begins down in Ponyville, Tennessee…

PROLOGUE:

We meet Twilight Sparkle preparing for her monthly slumber party. Taking great skill and care, she balanced the ladle's handle on the fruit punch so it balanced on the side of the in a 70 degree angle…because unicorns are neurotic perfectionists. At that time, Twilight's dragon assistant, Spyro, er- I mean Spike walked down the stairs carrying five books in his claws which all probably weighed more than himself. To the average person this would seem like helping, but in reality it's just a cute word for 'slavery'. Because dragons are apparently of a lower class than ponies or something. Anyway, Twilight looks up to see Spike struggling to balance with the books in hand, but is half oblivious of his troubles and uses her _wingardium Leviosa _levitation magic and yanks the books from Spike's claws, nearly causing him to fall off balance.

Twilight Sparkle: So what scary stories did you pick out for the sleepover?

Spike: Oh just the usual.

Twilight Sparkle began to read them out loud.

Twilight Sparkle: _Cthulhu_…no, too scary for Flutter Shy…_Monster Blood_…no, too grotesque for Rarity…_Lord of the Sprites,_ also too scary for Flutter Shy…._Twilight: New Moon_?

Spike shrugs innocently.

Egg Batter: *smokes pipe* Eeeeeeyup.

Twilight Sparkle: Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeah, no. Pinkie Pie will never sleep after the birth scene.

Twilight Sparkle reads the fifth book's cover. Two monster sprites (I dare you to guess what they are!) stand by each side of the cover's gold title: _Monsters of Kanto._

Twilight Sparkle: Huh, forgot I had this book…I don't even remember owning it.

Spike: It was one you bought on Amazon last week and forgot to read it.

Twilight Sparkle: Well this would be perfect. Now that's taken care of I want you to go into the kitchen and get some sparkle berry juice for the punch. It's kinda bland tasting at the moment.

Spike: Ay ay, higher majority!

-To the kitchen!-

Spike analyzes the refrigerator jam packed with magical food: there's magical Heinz ketchup, magical toad sweat mayonese, magical singing chicken wings, pumpkin juice, gem stone Scooby Snacks, Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Bean Dip, a six-pack of beer, Who-pudding, Who-hash, Who-roast beast…you get the idea. Then Spike noticed the glowing blue container that read 'juice' on the label.

Spike: This must be the stuff. What the odds of it being something different?

Egg Batter: Yeah, that would _never_ happen!

Without a second thought he grabbed the juice container, unbeknownst to the other juice container a few inches back of the fridge. (dun, dun duuuuuuuun!) He returned to the living room where Twilight was finishing off some finishing touches, oblivious to Spike pouring all the juice into the punch. (You with me here? HE. PUT. DAT. JUICE. IN. DAT. PUNCH. DAWG.)

The punch glowed brightly and then subsided, Spike thought nothing of it, because when you're a dragon living in a world with magical unicorns and you're forced to be in the low case based on how short you are, you tend to overlook the small stuff. With everything finally ready, the doorbell conveniently rang. Twilight rushed to the door to let her five guests in. (To those that are reading this solely for the Pokemon [yes they're coming, be patient] and have no idea what the names of the Mane6 are I strongly suggest watching the MLP:FiM show on YouTube, like now.) Also, they were wearing pajamas…I don't have a good joke for that, sorry.

Twilight Sparkle: Hey gir-

Pinkie Pie: Ooh! Is that punch! I loooove punch!

Pinkie Pie runs over to dip her head into the punch bowl.

Rarity: Ugh, Pinkie Pie, must you do this every sleepover?

Apple Jack: That girl needs tah learn sum self control. -I'm terrible at writing southern accents, so please pretend that's good, ah right sugarcube?-

Pinkie Pie lifts her head from the bowl, punch drips from her mane.

Pinkie Pie: Self control? Never heard of it.

Rainbow Dash: That's a surprise.

Pinkie Pie: I just love sleepovers! We get to stay up and play board games and sing songs oh I came up with a new obnoxious song you want to hear it well maybe not right now but anyway-

Rainbow Dash eyes at Twilight.

Rainbow Dash: Uh, what di you put in that punch exactly?

Twilight Sparkle: Too much of something apparently.

Pinkie Pie: -and that's how I invested in the stock market! …Gee wizz am I wet!

Pinkie Pie shook her head like a dog, sending a rain of punch flying at everypony + Spike. Everypony got wet. Srsly. (Remember that now)

Rarity: OH MY SILK PAJAMAS!

Twilight Sparkle: Pinkie Pie!

Pinkie Pie: What? I was wet!

Rainbow Dash: This means war! Pillow fight!

Flutter Shy: Um…let's not play too rough, please…

Spike yawns.

Spike: You girls have your fun, I'm hitting the hay.

Spike slunks upstairs to bed, while the ponies below try to dry themselves off with towels; Ranibow running off to get pillows.

Rarity: Oh Pinkie Pie, these stains will never wash out now!

Twilight Princess: I'll use a Clorox spell to fix the stain later, Rarity.

Rainbow returns with two pillows in hand. She throws one and then locks n' loads the other. (No seriously, it makes the 'cha-chak' sound)

Rainbow Dash: Let the pillow fight begi-

Thunder roars outside, and the electricity cuts out.

Flutter Shy: Eep!

Rarity: Wah?

Apple Jack: The Hey?

Rainbow Dash: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaw!

Pinkie Pie: Pudding!

GOD PONY: Problem?

Twilight uses her _lumos _spell to make her horn glow, because she's a boss.

Twilight Sparkle: Well since pillow fighting is out of the question, I think we should skip to storytelling.

Everypony nods.

Egg Batter: *smokes pipe* I already am.

-later-

Everypony anxiously waits in their sleeping bags for Twilight to read the story.

Rainbow Dash: I hope it has super sool ninja monsters!

Flutter Shy: I-I hope it's not too scary…

Rarity: I just hope it's not too long. I need my beauty sleep to keep my neurotic complexion.

Apple Jack: Ah just hopin' Pinkie Pie doesn't act out ahgain like last time. -Yes, just pretend it's good.-

Pinkie Pie: Tooth paste!

Apple Jack: Nevah mind…

Twilight waited for the ponies to hush, and then began to read.

Twilight Sparkle: 'Far away, in the land of Kanto, there existed two species: the humans and the monsters that inhabited the forests. Both species lived in peace separated from one another, but all that changed when the humans began to expand in to the monster's territory; destroying their homes. Soon, the monsters joined forces and fought back against the humans-"

Thunder crackled loudly making flutter Shy flee under her blankets.

Twilight Sparkle: For years the two species fought, each suffering great casualties. The war had weakened both sides and they both struggled to find nourishments within the chaos. Finally, when all seemed lost, the humans decided to use their technology not to destroy the monsters but to capture them and raise them as their own. They called their new invention: "The monster capsule." Soon, the monsters were captured one by one, and were raised with the humans. The fighting eventually ended and both humans and monsters made a pact to never fight again, and instead protect their world together. A special creed was made that day by the humans that would carry on for generations and all across the world…"

As Twilight read, the thunder outside grew louder, and the room began to glow a soft florescent purple light.

Rainbow Dash: Ah…did someone bring uranium with them?

Pinkie Pie: Nope, I left mine at home!

Apple Jack: Uh…come ahgain?

Twilight was oblivious of this and continued to read louder over the storm.

Twilight Sparkle: The creed read:

"I want to be the very best,

Like no one ever"

At that moment the floor glowed brightly and formed a circle around the ponies + Spike.

Rarity: Um…Twilight…

Twilight Sparkle:

"To catch them is my real test…"

Everypony in the room started to glow with the same purple luminosity.

Rainbow Dash: Ooooookay, now I'm freaking out…

Flutter shy: Make it stooooooooooooop!

Twilight Sparkle:

"to train them is my cause!"

Everypony glowed brighter.

Apple Jack: Twilight, have ya'll noticed we ah'll look like Christmas tree lights BECASUSE AH DO!

Rarity: Hmmm…this is quite odd but I do have to admit the purple does match my pajamas quite marvelously.

Rainbow Dash: I have a weeeeeeird feeling…

Fluttershy: Sanctuary! Sanctuary!

Pinkie Pie: MERRY CHRISTMAS!

At that moment a bright beam of light burst though the book engulfing the entire room, turning everything to pitch black darkness.

And they all died.

Egg Batter: Zing! Gotcha!

**Ponymon Part 1: Who the hey is that Pokemon?**

**-Darkness: cause moniter to go black- **

**Rainbow Dash groans and looks around. **

**Rainbow Dash: Any pony here? **

**Apple Jack: Uh, is that you Rainbow? **

**Rainbow Dash: Apple Jack! Where are you, I can't see a thing? …Where's everypony else? **

**Pinkie Pie: I'm here! Don't forget me! **

**Apple Jack: Yeah, that's a relief… **

**Rainbow Dash: Man, I have a pounding headache…that was one weird night… **

**Apple Jack: Tell me ahbout it. **

**Pinkie Pie: I woke up with the weirdest b-**

**Egg Batter: No U. **

**Pinkie Pie: *troll face* **

**Flutter Shy: Ooooooh….what's with all the noise? **

**Rainbow Dash: Flutter Shy, you're here too! **

**Apple Jack: But now where's Rarity or Twilight? **

**Pinkie Pie: Hmmmm…Oh! Look there's a door! **

**Everypony else: WHERE! **

**Pinkie Pie: Right there! I'm sure it leads to some pony. Well, smell ya later! **

**Rainbow Dash: Pinkie, I don't see a- *door slams* door… **

**Apple Jack: Ah great, now what we do? Ah can't see a thang. **

**Suddenly, a wild text bar appears. **

**Text: Are you a Boy or a Girl? **

**Rainbow Dash: Um…do floating text bars usually appear out of nowhere when you have a hangover? **

**Apple Jack: Did we even drink? **

**Flutter Shy: I didn't and I see the text bar. **

**Rainbow Dash: O RLY? **

**Apple Jack: 'Are you a Boy or ah Girl?' What kind ah question is that? **

**Flutter Shy: Maybe the text bar can't see us so it's asking what our gender is? **

**Apple Jack: Wait…Text bars have eyes? **

**Flutter Shy: Well not unless the text has eyes. **

**Apple Jack: Ah…what? **

**Flutter shy: Like this - (O_O) **

**Apple Jack: MAH GAWD **

**Rainbow Dash: Okay, can we please just answer it's question already? I, Rainbow Dash, the most awesomely sexah and better than any other pony, pony, am a girl. **

**Flutter Shy: Um…I'm a Girl. **

**Apple Jack: And ah am a girl pony too. **

**Text: What is your name? **

**Apple Jack: I'll go first if you won't mind; mah name is Apple Jack. **

**A picture of Apple Jack appeared on the screen. **

**Rainbow Dash: Okay, and my name is- **

**The screen changed to Flutter Shy's picture. **

**Text: And this is my grand daughter. She's been your rival since you were babies! What was her name again? **

**Rainbow Dash: -aaaaaand I guess you're up, Flutter Shy. **

**Flutter shy: Wait, I'm a rival to Apple Jack? **

**Apple Jack: *whispers to Flutter Shy* Just ahcept it, flutter Shy. This could be the only way out ah here. Besides, what ah the odds of this being a video game in which we have to compete against each other in some hare brained monster batting? **

**Rainbow Dash: Yeah, what are the odds of THAT happening? **

**Egg Batter: Yeah, what are the odds? **

**Apple Jack: Come on now, sugarcube. **

**Flutter Shy: Um…okay…my name is Flutter Shy. **

**The screen went blank into processing. **

**Rainbow Dash: And I am Rainb- **

**Text: Your Journey begins now! **

**Rainbow Dash: …eh? **

**Bright light flashes. The ponies slowly wake up to find themselves in a town. (hint: It's from a video game that rhymes with Digimon!)**

**Apple Jack: What in the hey just happened? **

**Rainbow Dash: You tell me! Where are we exactly? **

**Flutter Shy: It doesn't look anything like PonyVille. **

**Rainbow Dash: Yeah, everything is so…practical! **

**Apple Jack: Well we won't know much by just standin' around. We should find Twilight and the rest. **

**Everypony else: Right. **

**The trio head north. Before long, they came to the town square where humans are walking about. When they spot the ponies they stop and stare at the strangers. **

**Flutter Shy: *whispers* What kind of ponies are these? **

**Apple Jack: They don't look like ponies to me. **

**A human points at them and shouts. **

**Trainer: I've never seen one like that before! **

**Rainbow Dash stops and flaunts her wings up high. **

**Rainbow Dash: Well I guess you haven't the awesomely heroic (and sexah) Rainbow Dash! **

**Trainer: *takes out Pokeball* It talks! I have to catch that Pokemon! **

**Rainbow Dash: Who are you calling pokey? *ball hits her on the head* Ouch! **

**In a matter of minutes the three were being pelted by Pokeballs. **

**Apple Jack: Let's get the- ow! -hey out ah here! **

**The trio quickly ran with the humans close behind. They took a sharp turn and dove into the nearby grass. The humans look around and head a different direction. Everypony takes a sigh or relief. **

**Rainbow Dash: You know, I have an idea to where we may be… **

**Apple Jack: Ah'm with you on that one, sister. **

**Flutter Shy: So we're in a paradox dimension opposite of ours with different rules of physics, nature, and science where our entire existence is just an imaginary fairy tale or a TV show watched by teenage boys, in which we don't really exist at all and just being here is ripping the fabric of time and space in millions of other multi-universes? **

**Apple Jack: Ah was going to go with a Fan Fiction, but yeah, that works too.**

**Rainbow Dash: Nevermind… **

**Oak: Waaaaaaaaaaait! Don't venture into tall grass! **

**Enter Oak from stage left. (What? You didn't know I was making this into a Broadway production?) **

**Oak: Wild Pokemon appear in tall grass, you must not come prepared! **

**Rainbow Dash: Again with the Pokemon! What is going on here? **

**Oak ignores Rainbow Dash. **

**Oak: Ah, Apple Jack and Flutter Shy You must be anxious to start your journeys! **

**Apple Jack: Hey, how ya'll know our names? **

**Oak: I can explain, but you you'll have to come to my lab - to the Oak Cave! **

**(spin moniter for an added affect.) **

**-The Oak Cave- **

**Oak leads them to a table, where three balls sit. **

**Flutter Shy: This is a lab? **

**Apple Jack: Looks like ah rinky-dink pharmacy to me. **

**Oak fumbles with something on a computer desk. He then turns around holding two devices in his hands. **

**Oak: I have spent all my years researching Pokemon throughout the world. My dream was to one day record all these Pokemon in a portable encyclopedia (while everyone else was trying to figure out the alphabet and incorporate anything that didn't have "Poke" in it's title…they're still working on it). But alas, I am too old for this endeavor and need a couple of young legs, preferably ones of 10 year-olds, to leave their single mothers and venture into a world full of monsters, thugs, mobs, drug dealers, rapists, convicts, hipsters, hippies, Republicans, the mafia, the IRS, Xbots, liberals, and David Bowie; and the possibilities of contracting hypothermia, measles, Super Flu, HIV, AIDS, Swine Flu, Bird flu, SARS, and Monkey Pox; all to answer an old man's dying plea to fill a Game Boy machine with cheap LCD sprite animations of animals with their tails on fire. But you'll be just fine! **

**The ponies exchanged looks of disapproval, and huddled together to think of a plan. **

**Rainbow Dash: Ah…doesn't this guy strike you as kind of loony? **

**Apple Jack: Well he wasn't as hostile as the others, so maybe he is trying to help us? **

**Flutter Shy: Like how? I don't even know what a Pokemon is. **

**Rainbow Dash: Yeah, and who doe he think he is, ordering us to record an encyclopedia? So uncool! **

**Apple Jack: Ah say we should just take the job. It would give us an excuse to git out of here and look for the others. **

**Egg Batter: And a perfect excuse to move the plotline! **

**Rainbow Dash: Ugh, fine let's do it.**

**The ponies then stand in an orderly fashion. **

**Apple Jack: We'll take on your quest! **

**Oak: Excellent! Here's your Pokedex encyclopedias to record all the Pokemon you come across on your journey. And it also contains your trainer I.D. **

**Oak hands Apple Jack and Flutter Shy a Pokedex each. **

**Rainbow Dash: Wait, don't I get one? **

**Oak: I only had two of those newer models, but I guess I could give you the unused older model… **

**Rainbow Dash: I don't care. **

**Oak goes back to the computer desk and punches in configurations into the Pokedex. He then hands the Pokedex to Rainbow Dash afterwards. Rainbow flips open the screen to view her I.D. **

**Rainbow Dash: Thomas? My name's not- **

**Oak: Now you'll need to protect yourself out there. You may each choose a Pokemon for your journey. **

**Oak opens the capsule balls. Out popped three Pokemon. The ponies each give a gasp. **

**Rainbow Dash: Those are Pokemon? **

**Apple Jack: That will protect us? **

**Flutter Shy: CUTEGASM CUTEGASM CUTEGASM CUTEGASM… **

**Egg Batter: *shrugs* **

**Oak: Which one of you would like to go- **

**Flutter Shy: FIRST! **

**Oak: Okay, you may go first, Flutter Shy. You may choose between either Bulbasaur, Charmander, or Squirtle. **

**Flutter Shy: *sad face* You mean I can only pick one? **

**Oak: Yes.**

**Flutter Shy looks end early at the starters. **

**The starters look end early back at Flutter Shy. **

**Flutter Shy looks end early at the starters. **

**The starters look end early back at Flutter Shy. **

**Flutter Shy looks end early at the starters. **

**The starters look end early back at Flutter Shy. **

**Flut- **

**Rainbow Dash: Y U NO PICK ONE ALREADY? **

**Flutter Shy: Oh, um…I pick…Squirtle… **

**Oak returns Squirtle to it's Pokeball and hands it to Flutter Shy. **

**Oak: Take good care of your Pokemon and you won't be disappointed with the results. (but go ruling the world with it or anything!) **

**Flutter Shy: Oh, I'll take real good care of it. *rubs Pokeball* My preciousssssssss…. **

**Apple Jack: And now ah am disturbed. **

**Egg Batter: *shrugs* **

**Apple Jack: And ya are all soooo innocent… **

**Oak: Now.. **

**Rainbow Dash: My turn! **

**Oak: Apple Jack can pick her starter. **

**Rainbow Dash: *grumblegrumblegrumble* **

**Apple Jack looks over Bulbasaur and Charmander. **

**Rainbow Dash: Oh please, please, please don't pick the cool one… **

**Apple Jack: Ah pick Charmander, because he's got the most spark. **

**Rainbow Dash: Noooooooooooooooo! **

**Apple Jack receives Charmander. **

**Oak: And that leaves Bulbasaur for Thomas. **

**Thomas receives Bulbasaur. He picks the Pokeball up with his teeth and starts to walk out. **

**Rainbow Dash: Gee, thanks. Let's go gir- **

**Oak: LEEEEEEEEET'S GET READY TO RUUMMMMBLLLLLLLLLLLEEEE! **

**Rainbow Dash: Ah sh- **

**Text: Flutter Shy wants to battle! **

**Flutter Shy: Huh, what? **

**Rainbow Dash: What the hey? **

**Text: Send out your Pokemon and get READY TO RUUUMMMM- **

**Rainbow Dash: Shut up. **

**Flutter Shy: Are we supposed to be fighting? **

**Apple Jack: *in the stands* Well Oak did say the Pokemon would "protect you"…**

**Rainbow Dash: He did say that. **

**Flutter Shy: But…but… **

**Rainbow Dash: Let's just make this quick…so how do I do this? **

**Text: Select "Fight!" **

**Thomas opens his Pokedex. **

**Rainbow Dash: Ah, hat makes sense…AND DAMMIT STOP CALLING ME THOMAS! **

**Egg Batter: Problem, Thomas? **

**Rainbow Dash: Shut up. **

**Text: SEND OUT YOR POKEMANS. **

**Rainbow Dash: Fine…Bulbasaur, go! *sends out Bulbasaur* **

**Flutter Shy: Don't be too rough please…go, Squirtle! *sends out Squirtle* Use…a move that won't hurt…Tail Whip! **

**Squirtle used Tail Whip! **

**Rainbow Dash: Um, Flutter Shy I think the whole point of fighting is to try and beat your opponent. **

**Flutter Shy: But… **

**Rainbow Dash: Like this! **

**Bulbasaur used tackle! **

**Flutter Shy: Not so fast, I ACTIVATE MY TRAP CARD! **

**Rainbow Dash: …wrong crossover. **

**Flutter Shy: Oh… **

**Rainbow Das: Just play the game Flutter Shy. What could go wrong? **

**Egg Batter: Yeah, what go wrong? **

**Apple Jack: O RLY? **

**Flutter Shy: Um…I do...this! **

**Squirtle used Tail whip! **

**Rainbow Dash: ME GUSTA. **

**Bulbasaur used tackle! Squirtle used tail whip! Bulbasuar's Defense fell! Bulbasaur used tackle! Squirtle's HP became critical! An annoying beeping sound echoed through the lab! Why am I using so many exclamation points?**

**Apple Jack: What in the hey is that ahful racket? **

**Rainbow Dash: It's worse than Japanese Vocaloid! MAKE IT STOP, FLUTTER SHY! **

**Flutter Shy: Um….ahhhhhh…. **

**Rainbow Dash: ATTACK! **

**Flutter Shy: ummmm…SQUIRTLE USE….TACKLE! **

**Squirtle starts to attack. *play Chariots of Fire for 5 minutes and then come back* **

**We now return to I Love Pinkie Pie!**

**Squirtle's attack missed. **

**Flutter Shy: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! **

**Darth Vadar: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!**

**Simba: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! **

**Kirk: ! **

**Rainbow Dash: Yeah…references suck badly btw. **

**Egg Batter: *sad face* **

**Bulbasaur uses tackle! Squirtle fainted! **

**Text: Thomas wins the battle! **

**Apple Jack: Huh, guess Rainbow had the advantage of picking a stronger type after Flutter Shy. Guess it doesn't pay to be a troll. **

**Oak: She has chosen unwisely. **

**Apple Jack: Heh, I see what you did there. Adding an Indiana Jones quote.**

**Egg Batter: Hilarious right? **

**-cue end of battle- **

**Flutter Shy: OOOOOO- **

**Apple Jack: Ahright Suagr cube we git the point. It's not the end of the world that…*Flutter Shy points at Squirtle's limp body* ah dang…**

**Rainbow Dash returns Bulbasaur to it's ball and goes to stand over Squirtle. **

**Egg Batter: *plays Ave Maria* **

**Rainbow Dash: I'm sorry Flutter Shy, I had no-**

**Flutter Shy: *sob* I barely even knew it *sob* and now it's…g-gone! *sob* **

**Apple Jack: What ah cruel world this is. **

**Oak walks over to them, picks up Pokeball, returns Squirtle, places ball on healing machine, waits for timer, plays solitaire, moon walks, jogs around the house, calls Red's mom, takes ball off of machine, returns it to flutter Shy, puts on sun glasses. **

**Oak: There, good as new! **

**Everypony: B-B-B-B-B-B- **

**Egg Batter: B-b-benny and the Jetssssssssss! **

**Rainbow Dash: Shut up! **

**Flutter Shy: But it was…dead! **

**Oak: Pokemon cannot die in battle, but they can faint and will be unable to battle until they are taken to a Pokemon Center, which is free of charge and has hot nurses! You should always carry potions with you at all times too. **

**Egg Batter: Funny you never told Ash all of this… **

**Oak: Shut up, you! **

**Egg Batter: *forever alone* **

**Rainbow Dash: So Pokemon can't really die? **

**Egg Batter: UM LAVEN- *get shot* **

**Flutter Shy ignores them and continues to stroke her Pokeball. **

**Apple Jack: Aaaaaaaaand Flutter Shy has officially disturbed me. **

**Oak: You must vow to never use Pokemon for evil deeds. And should very be sold or bought with money. **

**Egg Batter: WHAT ABOUT PORY- *gets shot again* **

**Flutter Shy: I vow never to use my Pokemon for evil. **

**Apple Jack: Me neither! **

**Rainbow Dash: Yeah me neither…can we go now? **

**Oak: I wish you a safe (coughhighlyunlikely) journey. Risk your life and time and come back with a full Pokedex. **

**Rainbow Dash: And then what?**

**Oak: I'll give you a piece of paper saying "Thanks for playing!" **

**Rainbow Dash: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU- **

**Apple Jack: We're leavin' now. **

**-PONIES!- **

**They exit the lab with balls in their mouths….Pokeballs in their mouths. Thomas drops his on the ground. **

**Rainbow Dash: If we're going to we definitely need to get bags to carry our stuff in. **

**They spot a PokeMart. **

**Apple Jack: There's a store. Ah wonder what currency they use?**

**Thomas flips open his Pokedex. **

**Rainbow Dash: It says here I have 5,000...Pokedollars? Yup, this place is definitely eccentric. **

**Apple Jack and Flutter Shy check their Pokedexes'. **

**Flutter Shy: I have 5,000 too. **

**Apple Jack: I HAVE OVER 9000! **

**Apple Jack receives looks of disapproval. **

**Apple Jack: Nah, same here… **

**Rainbow Dash: Right, we need bags. Let's go in. **

**They go into the shop. **

**Reader: WAIT, THERE'S NO POKEMARTS IN PALLET TOW- *gets shot by Egg Batter* **

**Egg Batter: PRETEND THERE IS!**

**-Minutes later- **

**The ponies exit the store wearing caps, and bas loaded with stuff. **

**Rainbow Dash: Well we ended up spending all our money, but at least we're stocked. **

**Apple Jack: Now we just have to find the rest of the gang. *opens Pokedex map* It looks like we to have head north, because the south is blocked by sea. **

**Rainbow Dash: How big exactly is this place? *Apple Jack shows Thomas the map* Kill me please. **

**Apple Jack: We should get a move on. **

**Rainbow Dash: You think?**

**Egg Batter: *puts monicle on* Indeed. **

**Rainbow Dash: After this is over…I'm going to kill you. **

**The trio started walking until Thomas thought of something and stopped in his tracks. **

**Rainbow Dash: Waaaaait, does this place seem a little familiar to you guys? **

**Flutter Shy: Familiar? **

**Apple Jacks: We were here a few paragraphs ago. **

**Rainbow Dash: No, I mean does this all seem like déjà vu? Like we heard about all this before from somewhere? **

**Apple Jack and Flutter Shy exchange glances. **

**Rainbow Dash: Humans. Capturing monsters. Ring any bells? **

**Awkward silence. In Sinnoh, a Kircketot chirps. **

**Rainbow Dash: Forget it… **

**And thus the trio continues their journey.**

**To be continued… **

**Will the ponies ever find their friends? What dangers will they encounter next? Will they find the meaning of Christmas? Tune in next time for another overwhelming episode of: Ponymon 20% Red and Blue! (If I write it…)**


	2. Ah crap, I caught a Digimon!

Well…this is weird. According to my last story update for Ponymon was in March, and yet here I am, just getting e-mail notifications of how people love me…my writing anyway. I'd use a Slowpoke joke, but that would be mean, so instead I'll give what my current fans (and possible future fans) want and write the next chapter. It feels so surreal, really…writing the next exciting installment to a crossover I made up in 10 minutes. Er, did I say 10 minutes? I meant _years_. Yes, it took years of hard work and dedication to bring you this masterpiece you are reading right now-

Rainbow Dash: WHERE IN THE HEY WERE YOU?

Hey, I know you! You're my fourth favorite pony!

Rainbow Dash: WE'VE BEEN LOCKED IN LIMBO FOR THREE MONTHS WHILE YOU DO NOTH- Wait, did you just say fourth favorite pony?

Hehe, well it's kinda hard to choose, since you're all awesome and al-

Rainbow Dash: Yeah, yeah, whatever. So where in the hey were you?

I was in the bathroom.

Rainbow Dash: I don't believe that.

Hey, I have a life! In fact I'll probably finish this tomorrow-

Rainbow Dash: NO WE'VE BEEN STUCK IN SUSPENDED ANIMATION FOR THREE MONTHS WAITING TO GET OUT OF PALLET TOWN! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE NARRATING THIS! DO IT!

Ooh, I'm the narrator? I think I had a cool MLP OC name too…

Rainbow Dash: It was Egg Batter.

…Egg Batter?

Rainbow Dash: YES. Can we please continue the story now?

But why Egg Batter?

Rainbow Dash: HOW SHOULD I KNOW YOU MADE IT UP?

Don't yell at me… D:

Rainbow Dash: Ugh…do what you have to do then come back and finish the story.

Yay! :D

-is gone for several minutes and then returns-

Rainbow Dash: Where were you?

In the bathroom. :3

Rainbow Dash: **-**facedesks-

I think I'm up to continuing the story now!

Rainbow Dash: Oh good.

Flutter Shy: Yay!

Last time on PonyBall Z…

Twilight Sparkle: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!

Apple Jack: !

Rainbow Dash: SONIC RAAAAAAAAINBOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!

Pinkie Pie: !

Rarity: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!

Flutter Shy: YOU"RE GOING TO LOVE MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Whoops! Wrong fanfic!

Ponymon Part 2: Ah crap, I caught a Digimon!

The trio pressed onward through Route 1, on an exciting journey to catch all the Pokemon!

Apple Jack: Ahhhhhhhh, no. We're here to find our friends and get home.

Egg Batter: That too!

Suddenly, the screen started to flash and a wild Rattata appeared!

Apple Jack: Gahlee, seizures anyone?

Flutter Shy: DO WANT!~

Rainbow Dash: That's supposed to be a Pokemon? It looks like a rat.

Egg Batter: No, it's mouse. Rattata, the mouse Pokemon.

Rainbow Dash: …I don't even…ugh, whatever. Flutter Shy, try to cat-

Fluttershy already catches Rattata.

Rainbow Dash: -ch it…

Flutter Shy: Oh, you're so cute. I'll name you…Ratty.

Apple Jack: We should try and catch Pokemon too, Rainbow.

Rainbow Dash: What? We don't need Pokemon! We can take care of ourselves! Besides, who's going to stop us?

Apple Jack: Ah, gangs, terrorists and Republicans?

Rainbow Dash: Sooo, Mitt Romney is going to attack us at one point, because we don't have Pokemon to protect us?

Egg Batter: Hey, that would be kinda funny, I'll have to write that dow-

Rainbow Dash: NO.

Egg Batter: (Okay face)

Apple Jack: But Dash, other people will have Pokemon too. If we don't defend ourselves how will be able to beat them?

Rainbow Dash: By kicking them in the arse!

Apple Jack: Ya no.

Rainbow dash: Fine, I'll catch a Pokemon…how did that last one appear again?

Apple Jack: Random battles. You walk around and they just appear.

Rainbow Dash: They _just _appear randomly?

Apple Jack: It's a traditional RPG thing.

Rainbow Dash: And people find this fun how?

Egg Batter: lol I dunno, it sells in the millions.

Apple Jack: No ya'll, it's the experience of adventure and excitement. It's to not know what comes up next or when to expect it. It's the thrill of finding something completely new. It's the thrill of the catch and release…to find something not found before…and it's yours to keep, so you may continue the journey and find more creatures. Until the day you can proudly say you've seen it all. –angel chorus plays-

Rainbow Dash: Yeeeeeeeeah, it still sucks.

Egg Batter: Just be thankful you're not in the Final Fantasy universe.

Apple Dash: What's so bad about that universe?

Egg Batter: CUT SCENES, CUT SCENES EVERYWHERE!

Apple Dash: -faints-

Rainbow Dash: Sigh, let's get this over with.

A wild Rattata appears!

Rainbow Dash: Okay, you're mine! Go pokeball!

Pokeball misses…Rattata runs away!

Rainbow Dash: This is harder than I thought…

Apple Jack: Just keep trying, Sugar Cube…say where's Flutter Shy?

The ponies look around them and see Flutter Shy nowhere in sight. Suddenly, she comes prancing happily through the bush, humming as she walks. She drops four balls on the ground in front of her.

Rainbow Dash: Um, where were you and what is this?

Flutter Shy: I caught more Rattata! I named them Remy, Ratatouille, Scabbers, and Gus!

Apple Jack and Thomas' mouths dropped open.

Apple Jack: Ya mean to tell me that you caught all four of those in the 2 minutes it took the readers to read all that text to this point?

Flutter Shy: Well it's easy once you know the trick to it. If you decrease their HP before you throw the ball, you'll have a much better chance at catching them. I also wrote a mathematical theorem of the fundamental physics laws for catching them.

Flutter Shy shows the paper to the other two.

Apple Jack: YA FIGURED AWL THAT OUT IN 2 MINUTES?

Flutter Shy: It wasn't that hard. All I had to do was carry the 2 and replace x with h – 5l.

Rainbow Dash: Yeah, yeah, carry the two. I just needed to know a trick, that's all. Okay, now to catch a Pokemon!

Thomas searches the grass and encounters a Pidgey.

Rainbow Dash: Oh, a bird! You have wings so you must be cool like me! You definitely should be in my team!

Flutter Shy: Um, Rainbow Dash don't forget-

Rainbow Dash: Yeah I know, reduce HP, I got it. Go Bulbasaur! –sends out Bulbasaur- Bulbasaur use tackle! –Pidgey loses some HP- Okay now I'll use a Pokeball!

Flutter Shy: Um, Rainbo-

The ball is flung into the air…it does a backflip, it somersaults, it does a 360, it does a triple toe, it plays the castanets in D Major, it spins towards the Pokemon AND IT…OHHHHHH it falls short 15 feet from the yard line. And that's game, folks! The Colts win again and that makes this their seventh winning streak this season. What do you think, Bob? Well Mike, when I see a performance like that I wonder "who the heck put that guy up there?" I mean really, who could miss a shot like that and not feel bad about it-

Rainbow Dash: GTFO

The ball game is cancelled and poor little Timmy never got to catch the loss fast ball. (Yeah, I'm mixing up sports here, so sue me.) Thomas grumbles under his breath.

Rainbow Dash: Ugh, I'm terrible at this!

Flutter Shy: Maybe it would be better if I let you borrow my five Rattata.

Rainbow Dash: That would make a difference?

Flutter Shy: They're not very strong, but they cause minor damage without fainting the Pokemon, so you'll be able to catch it more efficiently.

Rainbow Dash: Thanks, Flutter Shy!

Flutter Shy: Would you like to review the theorem too?

Rainbow Dash: Haha, no.

Flutter Shy gives Thomas her Pokemon, and Thomas continues to scour the grass. The same Pidgey appears.

Rainbow Dash: -inhales, exhales- My body is ready! Go, Ratty!

-Many exclamation points later-

Rainbow Dash: Okay, the Pokemon is in the red and the annoying beeping sound has begun. Hope this works…GO…Pokeball!

The ball is flung into the air…it does a backflip, it-

Rainbow Dash: Just get on with it.

Egg Batter: Fine, (party pooper) the ball hits…IT SCORES! But wait…it's still wiggling…once…twice…THREE TIMES! TOUCHDOWN! THE PACKERS WON THE SUPERBALL! WE'RE ALL GOING TO DISNEYLAND! WEEEEEEEEEEE AAAAAAAARE THE CHAAAAMPIONS MY FRIEEENDS! AND WEEEEEE-

Rainbow Dash: Shut up. Whoa, I caught one! Take that Romney! I'll call this guy Dashie! After me of course.

Thomas holds the ball in his hand for a second, only until it fades and blinks away.

Rainbow Dash: Eh? Ah…eh?

Apple Jack: Eh?

Canada: Eh?

Rainbow Dash: Where the hell did it go?

Egg Batter: lolidun- -gets shot-

Rainbow Dash: How? Why? It was my first!

Flutter Shy: Oh, um, I forgot to tell you that you can only have 6 Pokemon in your team at any time.

Thomas runs over and shakes Flutter Shy.

Rainbow Dash: BUT WHERE DID DASHIE GO?

Flutter Shy: Oh, it's in a storage PC in the Pokemon Center.

Rainbow Dash: What are we waiting for let's go get him!

Apple Jack: Ah'll say it again…YA FIGURED AWL THAT OUT IN 2 MINUTES?

The ponies start to run to the Pokemon Center.

Rainbow Dash: So what exactly is the storage PC?

Flutter Shy: It's a CGM to keep your Pokemon in the P.C, FYI. You can D.I.Y. and download the iOS to get updates on the GLT, or check stats for your I.V's or E.V's.

Rainbow Dash: O. I. C.

Apple Jack: I.V's? They better not be sticking needles into me! I ain't up for charity!

-Viridian City, Nevada; Pokemon Center-

The trio walked through the Pokemon Center.

Rainbow Dash: Okay guys, act cool. We need to pretend we're trainers, so no one wi- Aaaaaaaaaaaah, OOF!

Thomas tripped over a slowpoke's tail. His hat flew off, revealing the emo rainbow hair that lay underneath.

Rainbow Dash: Hey! My hair's not emo!

Trainer Nerd: Egads! A shiny talking Keldeo!

Geek: Let's catch it and rant about it on Youtube!

Rainbow Dash: I HATE THOSE RANT VIDEOS! THEY GET MORE HITS THEN THEY DESERVE!

The Nerd/Geek walks over to Thomas slowly. AJ look around and sees a guy leaving.

Apple Jack: Hey look, George Lucas!

Trainer Nerd: GEORGE LUCUSH I LUVSH YOU!

Exit Nerd/Geek. (That was the comedy relief act btw.)

Rainbow Dash: You're writing is bad and you should feel bad!

Egg Batter: Who's saying all the references?

Rainbow Dash: FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF-

Apple Jack: Aw, let's just get our Pokemon healed.

The trio walks up to the counter.

Nurse Joy: Hello, and welcome to the Pokemon Cen-

Rainbow Dash: How much will this cost?

Flutter Shy: It's free.

Apple Jack: I'm not even going to ask how she knows that…

Rainbow Dash: Okay lady, don't take too long!

Nurse Joy: Okay, I'll take your Pokemon for a few seconds.

Thomas gives Joy the Pokemon in the Pokeballs. Ding-ding-dingding-ding! (I love that.) Joy returns the Pokemon to Thomas.

Nurse Joy: Thank you for your patience. Your Pokemon have been healed. We hope to see you again.

Rainbow Dash: Yeah, sur-

Nurse Joy: Hello, and welcome to the Pokemon Center!

Rainbow Dash: What the fu-

Apple Jack: That's what happens if you tap the A button too much between dialogue windows. It's what ya git for being impatient.

Rainbow Dash: Dialogue win-

Nurse Joy: Would you like me to heal your Po-

Rainbow Dash: No, f*** you, give me back my-

Nurse Joy: Okay, I'll take your Pokemon for a few seconds.

Rainbow Dash: -head desks the table repeatedly-

Nurse Joy: Thank you for your patience-

Apple Jack: What patience?

Nurse Joy: We hope to see you again!

Rainbow Dash: I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN IN MY LIFE…UNLESS MY POKEMON ARE LOW ON HP!

AJ and Flutter Shy sigh. Thomas gives back Flutter Shy's Rattata and grumbles over to the P.C. Out pops a Pokemon, assumingly containing Dashie.

Rainbow Dash: -puts sun glasses on- We're out of here, girls.

-later-

The trio goes due north and meets an old man in the road. His daughter stands near him. (Please excuse me if this is wrong, I haven't played the originals in a long time)

Daughter: I'm sorry, but my father is not letting anyone past this point now.

Flutter Shy: Oh…we'll just find another way then-

Rainbow Dash: Don't worry about it, we'll just go over him.

Daughter: Huh? You can't do that to an elder!

Rainbow Dash: Why is he laying in the street anyway.

Daughter: He didn't have his coffee.

Rainbow Dash: Are you f***ing kidding me? We're on a mission here. We have friends to find that might be in danger. We have a Pokedex to fill. We're not even remotely close. And you're not letting us go because an old man FORGOT TO DRINK HIS ! $# $ %# %$#!^ %^%#$ COFFEE?

At that moment the old man shot up from the ground.

Old man: You kids are trainers?

Everypony: Yes.

Old man: And you're trying to collect every Pokemon for Professor Oak?

Everypony: YES.

Old man: And you want to go through here?

Everypony: YES! YES!

Old man: Then you can go…

Everypony: Yay! Wa-ho-

Old man: After I badly show you how to catch a Pokemon!

Old man gets trampled.

The trio continue their journey. Catching 40 more Rattatas as they go. AJ takes out here Pokedex and checks the map.

Apple Jack: Our next destination is Viridian forest.

Rainbow Dash: Bring it on! I have Bulbasuar and Dashie! There is no way we can lose!

Apple Jack: Yeeeeeah, no offense but I wouldn't bet ah dime on you.

Just then a wild Caterpie appeared!

Flutter Shy: Oh, it's so cute! But you should try and catch it this time, Rainbow.

Rainbow Dash: Gee thanks, Flutter Shy. I feel honored to catch a new Pokemon.

Flutter Shy: Actually, I just caught 9 of them already.

Rainbow Dash: Ah…well this chapter gone long enough sooooo, Go Dashie!

Dashie appeared from the Pokeball.

Dashie: Biyomon, ready to roll!

Rainbow Dash: Okay Dashie use…who the hell are you?

Egg Batter: It's a Digimon.

Apple Jack: Which is like ah Pokemon right?

Egg Batter: No, it's digital.

Apple Jack: yeah…

Flutter Shy: You must have took the wrong one by mistake.

Rainbow Dash: They all looked the same, gah!

Egg Batter: No U, there's a fine difference. Digimon are from a whole different universe entirely. Digimon stands for "Digital Monsters" and they come from a whole different world with a completely different plotline…blah,blah, blahblahblah-

Rainbow Dash: This…is going to be a LONG journey…

To be Continued…

Thanks sooooooo much for being patient everypony! I wish I had got this up sooner, but I kept getting distracted and just couldn't find the time to write. I can't believe it's actually finished… Also, PLEASE REVIEW! Don't keep me hanging either! Don't break a Pinkie promise! NEVER BREAK A PINKIE PROMISE!


End file.
